fan vs apple

I’ve been looking at a few potential candidates in terms of pendants to purchase, and for the past few days have been deciding between a flower, a pink fan and a red apple. I asked the opinions of the few who would understand my peculiarities (how does one answer the question ‘am I a flower, a pink fan or a red apple?’) and so far, the conclusions that surfaced are: apples are common, the pink fan somehow suits me and i’m more suited for sons.

eh?

Deep down I know which pendant I prefer, if not for the existence of the lobster clasp that comes with it, it would have been an immediate buy, but I guess we can’t win it all, can we? With that little bit of hesitation comes the want of assurance, for opinions to go in line with my own. Someone please tell me that i should buy that, because yes i think it’s cute and i do want it (if it looks nice on a chain!). If I am to really dissect my motives, it’s not so much of garnering opinions but the reassurance of my own – which, so far. has failed.

I wonder why sometimes we succumb to these reassurances, like my little moment between a red apple and a pink fan, why when we know what we want, we need people around us to assure and affirm that we’re getting/doing/feeling the right things, we need to hear words and advice from others about what we should do, deep down already knowing what we should do. I wanted to hear affirmations of how i should buy this, I wanted to smile at the unity of a few minds on one matter, but why would i want that? if i already knew, already had a firm preference for one over the other? What is it that prompts us to need such reassurances (that perhaps i’m not too overbold to state, that everyone succumbs to).

I want the red apple, or at least until the whim fades away. If it doesn’t, i guess from now on i’ll have an additional apple around my neck!